05 April 2009

Hey President Obama!

Over here!
Oh, hello. Do I have your attention?
Good. I love attention.
I know that you're busy with the failures of capitalism and stuff, but you're forgetting about your #1 nemesis — me. I'm not sure why you're messing around with Queen Elizabeth. She is not dangerous. You should be giving me an iPod, not her. 
Well, I hope you learned your lesson about not giving me your full attention. See, while you weren't looking, I used advanced North Korean technology to place a communication satellite in low geosynchronous orbit. 
Very, very low orbit.  
Quite a wet orbit, actually...because it is a communications satellite for fish! That's right, our launch was a completed and unmitigated success. North Korea has taken the lead in advanced communication with fish and, um, other ocean stuff. So, be afraid,  imperialist running-dog.
P.S. Hungry, send more food.

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